Albert Gore announced today that he and Tipper, his wife of forty years, are separating.
Gore explained that when he is near Tipper, she is too hot to handle and becomes a major contributor to global warming.
To save the planet, Gore said that Tipper has agreed to live separate and apart.
Gore also said that when he and Tipper are in the same room, she suffered from significant bouts of heavy breathing, exhaling super-heated and dangerous carbon dioxide into the atmosphere.
Gore said that the US Environmental Protection Agency has frequently identified Tipper as a major point source polluter. For his current role as an environmentalist, Gore said that Tipper has become an inconvenient spouse,
Gore also said that Tipper left the bathroom light on at night.
Albert Gore is a former vice president of the United States, Nobel Prize winner and recipient of an Oscar award. He was also the unsuccessful Democratic presidential candidate in the 2000 elections losing to George W. Bush.
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Tuesday, June 1, 2010
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